Nothing wrong with that I guess, as she is an extremely attractive proposition, but it's a bit dreary isn't it? A bit fanboyish sticky stain on mattress to be awkwardly explained to mother? And she's not really very robotic either.
In the same way that Patti Smith said "If you are male, then choose something other than female" on the Old Grey Whistle test while singing "Land" (it's not called Horses you know, that song), why not perhaps look at something that is a little more mechanical. Like the Robot Maria from "Metropolis".
I realise I'm being a little female-centric at the moment, so for those more into cybernetic men, enjoy the practical, utilitarian sexiness of Donald Moffat as Rem from the TV series of "Logan's Run."
Still, it's all rather obviously human. Doctor Who tale "The Five Doctors" featured the Raston Warrior Robot, asexual yet sleekly elegant, and clearly an inspiration for the weird woman who walks around in modern day crap Krypton Factor "The Cube".
In the same way that there is a fetish for attractive amputee Russian ladies - so I've been led to believe - then some folk will be drawn to the stumpish Disney versions of R2D2 that were seen in "The Black Hole"; VinCENT and Old BOB. Note that Old BOB is a bit beat up, and is thus ideal for those with a "Crash" style orthopedic fetish...callipers and the like.
But to me the sexiest robot of all is found in the strange sci-fi vehicle for Kirk Douglas' saggy old bottom, "Saturn 3". Hector is a God Class robot designed to be trained by direct input from someone else's brain. Unfortunately the person concerned is deranged murderer Benson, played by Harvey Keitel, who rocks a pony tail and a hole in his head, and issues forth sensational dialogue at Farrah Fawcett. Dubbed by Roy Dotrice for some reason.
"You have a wonderful body...may I use it?"
But it's no joy for Harvey or Hector, as the robot develops a parallel obsession for Ms Fawcett, and pursues her up and down accompanied by strange bionic man style sound effects, killing dogs and eventually wearing Harvey Keitel's head on top of his own.
Sexual perversions - which weren't his fault - aside, Hector is a magnificent creation. All shiny chrome fashioned in a futuristic version of Michaelangelo musculature, he is a robot of fearsome power with a four foot long brain kept in a jar in his back. Forget the fact he has an angelpoise lamp for a head and walks like an arthritic miner, this is a polished, sophisticated, and terrifying, machine that deserved to be in a far better film than this one.
Copyright Bloody Mulberry 18.03.14
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